Portrait of happy relaxed woman with autumn leafs in front of foliage making selfie

 Loving Yourself is a NO GUILT Zone

We live in a culture that gets great results using guilt but this method stands in the way when you try to love yourself unconditionally. Advertisers and your relationships know that to persuade, convince, control and manipulate you to buy comes from this not so golden word GUILT.

To truly love yourself unconditionally you need to step out of guilt. Let the pesky guy go find somewhere else to live.

When you start to live your life differently, and not play the same ball game as those around you, you may see a change in your relationships. In fact I can almost guarantee it. Others will feel threatened because you aren’t thinking and acting in a way to fit their pictures to the will play the GUILT card to get back their power over you.

Often you or some one you know will use guilt to get back their control. Often parents (we love you dearly parents) slip into this behavior because it is all you know. Parents or others will use guilt, anger, and withdrawal of love to dominate. As a parent, I have used guilt too and it would actually work for a little while but then BAM like boomerang guilt would come back and put me down big time.

Here is the tricky part. When you feel lack of control you may feel you must manipulate or engage in power struggles to get what you want. You might fall into making excuses or tell white lies to protect other people’s feelings.

Listen closely to this next part, when you act in this way you do not love to yourself and you give your subconscious the message that who you are is not enough.

Yike! Yes that’s the way the subconscious plays the game.

ducklings on the white background

How to Play a Clean Game

Don’t manipulate other people

Gain freedom by giving other’s their freedom

Know that you are gaining honesty for yourself

Have the courage to release control

Learn to detach from the reactions of others and most of all your own emotions

In conclusion, real control of your life is more successful when you find ways to love yourself unconditionally and that means looking at how you experience this freedom and at what cost. Guilt comes at a high price and is only successfully on the short term. So it is to your advantage to try slipping out of the guilt trap when you are tempted to use it to control others and yourself.